The knitting gods obviously don't approve of my bad language...

I'm on the second chart repeat of Pomatomus, getting along great and I've just found my rhythm.

Then the Ball from Hell decides to spew out this:

Apparently this phenomenon is called 'yarn barf' but in this case the ball pretty much turned itself inside out. I'm furious.

I have about the same sized tangle that took me 4 hours to undo. My options seem to be:
1. Pouring myself a stiff one and trying to untangle, however I have my sock-in-progress attached to one end so that will be even harder/potentially risky.
2. Knit a bit, untangle a bit, knit a bit. No, I get stressed out just typing that.
3. Putting the work I've done on a holder and starting the second sock from the outside of the ball. Pain in the arse and I'm not looking forward to another 10 rows of 1x1 rib (knitting into the effing back loop).
4. Cutting. I'll be fucked if I have to cut into a ball of wool that someone (admittedly not me) spent a good sum of money on.

I'm of no doubt now that ball winding is a skill in itself, time consuming, and requiring at the least a good level of ability and at the most a ton of equipment. I'm not here for that, I'm here for the knitting.

Fuckity fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.

See you next Tuesday x

Some people may find this hat in bad taste. But I happen to like pom-poms, ok?

Behold the master!

I am now a knitting guru. This is because I have a protegé, Sylvie-Claire, another lost au pair in Paris I met through Facebook. We totally cyberstalked each other, she left a message in an au pair group and I spied her dreads and was like, yeah, she needs to be my friend! And when we met she was like, "you knit too! so do I!" and I was like "OMGZ that is SO COOL I don't know anyone else in real life who knits! what do you knit?" and she was like, "scarves" and I was like, "OMGZ you really need to get into making other stuff coz it like totally rox!"

From what she told me and the pics she sent of her stuff I could see she was well ready to progress. I know that if I hadn't found the amazing Stitch and Bitch books I'd still be doing flat pieces and... um... hats made out of three panels of knitting. We went shopping last Saturday at La Droguerie and she bought some mohair for a scarf and some wool for hat. By about Tuesday she sent me a pic of her stripey scarf which was already massive. I was like, "girl, now iz the time for you to be makin hatz".

She was given a hat pattern along with her wool in La Droguerie, but it was all in French. So I sent her these instructions that I cobbled together in an email.

Tonight she came online around midnight (I'm stuck at home babysitting, she's stuck at home because of the transport strike) and needed some help... I talked her through finishing off her hat. The conversation was kinda like talking something through delivering a baby (or so I'd imagine) concluding in the ecstatic, moving climax when she emailed me pics of the finished object. I confess a tear almost welled up in my eyes.

The next step is to teach her how to make hats emblazoned with expletives...

I win

My willpower has been amazing lately. On Saturday I took Sylvie to La Droguerie, where she bought two balls of mohair and some wool. We waited about ten minutes amongst all the gorgeous wool for the balls to be wound and I managed not to buy anything.

Yesterday I went to Le Bon Marché because I needed a set of 5 dpns for my Pomatomus socks, and managed to walk away with only the needles, although I was sorely tempted by a scarf kit, of all things, produced by La Droguerie.

I got lots of moral support after posting my ball winding woes on Ravelry. Glad to see I'm not the only one. Strikes me as weird though that as we speak, 4 people have clicked 'agree' on my post, and 4 have clicked 'disagree'. How can anyone disagree with my post? Are they disputing I spent 4 hours untangling 200 yards of wool? I guess some people must just really love making balls... good for them. Perhaps they should start advertising their services.

aaaaaaand...

... now I realise I never posted my last, amazing FO. The impact will be lessened slightly seeing as Halloween has passed.

Pretty hat yes? No! Click here for a fright. People with heart conditions are advised to proceed with caution.

This post is edumacational

Been a lazy blogger lately. Went back home to Liverpool for a week and a half and was busy, busy, busy. Although that's no reason why I've only just got around to sorting these pictures out from my trip to Musée d'Orsay in September. I took them in RAW format and forgot about them... anyway, behold:

Knitting Art in Paris by Helen Wilkie

First off, I saw this painting, "Bergère avec son troupeau" (Shepherdess with her flock) by Millet. Click title for full pic. As you will see, she's using DPNs. I didn't even know of their existence until 2005.

Next off, also in the Musée d'Orsay, a statue of a girl... er... spinning? I have no knowledge at all of spinning. And I have no desire too, my patience has already been put to its limits winding up a ball (more to follow).

Next, I saw these murals in the Bastille metro station. Apologies for the photos, I took them on my phone and there were some people sitting right beneath them, wondering what the hell I was doing. They show tricoteuses, and were obviously painted by someone who's never knit.

This ends today's lesson.

I have one lousy FO to post. My second Short Row Hat made with Noro Kureyon. This colourway matches my bag almost perfectly, which thrills me no end.


And now a rant about skeins of yarn, which I've already vented on Ravelry. I have a gorgeous skein of Cherry Tree Hill that Interannette sent me in a swap. I'm absolutely desperate to cast it on to make some socks. Last night I sat down with a loo roll and the second series of Spaced on dvd and started to wind my ball. By the end of the dvd (seven or eight episodes and some extras) I was still left with this:

That's one large, slightly wonky ball of wool, a knot and another little ball of wool where I realised I would have to start untangling from the other end.

That's four hours of my life I'll never get back. Thank god for Simon Pegg, Jessica Stephenson and my insomnia. I could have been up to the heel of the first sock my now!

Seriously though, I'm actually quite annoyed now about the whole practice of selling yarn in skeins. Unless you've got a ball winder and/or swift you've got a long, boring, difficult job on your hands before you can even get down to the knitting. It doesn't make economic sense, in the money or time sense to buy yarn in skeins if you've got to go out any buy more equipment. I feel like it's a bit of an affectation - "I'm so dedicated to knitting I'm prepared to suffer for it". Yarn does look nice in a big twisted hank but it's so impractical. As people on Ravelry pointed out, you pay more for the yarn and then have to wind it yourself, whereas cheapo mass produced stuff comes ready wound. I think we're being had.

Not that I don't love my yarn and have lots of respect for independent yarn producers. Maybe I'd just like to kick up a bit of a stink so traders might start offering the option of ordering yarn pre-wound.

Anyway... once I get past this knot I think a pair of Pomatomus are in order (that's a helluva lot easier to type than to say).

The Ravelry love continues...

So today I bought some yarn to make me one of these for Halloween. That was around 12 hours ago and I've only just got to casting on thanks to going on Ravelry to input the project and the yarn and a few photos, and of course, check up on the pinny-porn debate.

When I left it, there were getting onto 600 posts (over nine days). When I logged in this evening, it had shot up to around 850. Wow, what's got the Ravelers incensed now? Glass of wine in hand, I got myself comfy and settled down to read the ten new pages. I even almost considered grabbing a pen and paper to take notes...

What a disappointment. Someone made a flippant, tension-easing comment along the lines of 'who wants some pie?'. The next ten pages consisted solely of 'my favourite pie/the last pie I ate/pies I have loved and lost'. I managed to find a couple of on-topic posts with my finger held firmly on the down key.

Well, this wasn't good enough. I took out my hosepipe and rained on their parade. I pointed out that when religion had reared it's ugly head, people began to comment that the thread had gone off-topic. I argued that the thread had simply evolved in that direction. However, people appearing out of nowhere to scream 'blueberry pie!' was, in my opinion, a thread-jack.

(I've just realised I'm blogging about an arguement on a website. Note to self: get a life.)

As you can expect, people came back to me and said 'hey, what's a little light relief?' but I kept on sulking and picked up on someone else's point that it's a sorry day when people are afraid to speak up about religion or feminism but mention pies and the internet practically bursts at the seams. I went further to mention that I'd read the blog of the sole voice in favour of a literal interpretation of the bible and the submission of wives (yeah, it was that interesting!) and she'd mentioned that she'd received PMs of support in direct consequence of her posts. I slightly unwittingly put the cat amongst the pigeons by suggesting that it would be a shame if these people hadn't spoken up in support of her in public, but were all about the pies.

Well, I couldn't have predicted what happened next. One of the very people who PM-ed posted, saying that she had contacted the original poster, and that she had been wary of speaking up beforehand because of how other people might perceive her. She said she wasn't proud of this and went on to state her beliefs. She then thanked me personally for 'calling her out'.

I really don't know what to say now. I'm quite taken aback at how my words have caused someone to make a very brave and bold step. I'm also repeatedly surprised at the civility, patience and friendliness of a type of Christian I'm naturally inclined to abhor. Certainly, it could be a tactic - they are 'charismatic' after all, but I actually don't want to believe that. I guess I want to believe I've learnt something, from Ravelry yet again, that your enemy can sometimes be a lot more likeable than your ally.

Also, it has occurred to me that accusing people of staying silent may lead to an enormous number of fundamentalist Christians to come crawling out of the woodwork. This wouldn't make me very popular, I'm sure, but I'd be happy with it. The whole reason I was upset about my beloved thread being dumbed-down was that, while I wax-lyrical about my favourite subjects all the time, I hardly ever do with people who don't generally agree with me. Like most people I hang around with others with similar interests so even if I suddenly got the urge, I couldn't find a born-again Christian to sound off with.

The good thing about Ravelry/the internet/knitting is that it brings people together, but not necessarily all the same type of people.

Quick photo update? Short row socks (ugh), soon to be frogged on their gorgeous holders (yey!)...

Some crazy idea I had with the Flamme Bayadere to make mittens. Soon to be frogged. Pretty gross huh?

Ravelry Love

In addition the to fact that it's internet heroin, I'm stuck in the Parisian suburbs (which make Caversham look dull, never thought I'd say that) and totally missing grown up conversation in English. This results in me spending vast amounts of time on Ravelry, in particular the forums.

I'm currently engaged in a very thought-provoking, controversial (but always civilised) debate on religion, feminism, semantics and how they all relate to knitting. There's a born again Christian on there with some ultra-controversial views, but I can't help but like her because; 1. she's super polite and good humoured and 2. she's a knitter, and on Ravelry, and everyone on Ravelry is a cut above the rest of the internet.

It's also quite bizarre to have such a heated discussion amongst people whose avatars are mostly fluffy kittens, babies, and knitted stuffed toys.

Anyway, to the knitting, I'm in a bit of a lull at the moment. I cast on these amazing socks but I'm having a nightmare of a time doing them on 4 dpns. It might be time to try out the 2 x circular needles method. That would be a shame though, seeing as I've just received these magical delights:
DPN protectors from Three Owls Knitting on Etsy.com. My socks will no longer fall apart in my bag! Once again, I have Ravelry to thank for these. I posted a question about how to transport WIPs on DPNs and found out about them from the maker herself.

I also cast on my Flamme Bayadere on some DPNs with the intention of making some sort of mittens, but I'm bored already. It's 100% wool and I'm getting a faint urge to try felting...

My Dashing mitts are finished, and have already been worn around Paris a few times. Taking pictures of both your hands at the same time is a pain in the arse. I used the self timer but because I have to have a fancy DSLR I can't see the view finder in the mirror. Here they are anyway...

Voilà!

Blimey, things are flying off my needles faster than I can update my progress bars on Ravelry! I've got about 10 rows and the thumb to finish on my second Dashing mitt, and the mohair I bought on Monday is now this spiffing hat...

(You have no idea how many shots it took, and how many times I almost dislocated my arm, to get even that photo, and it's still crap).
As it's red, I'll probably wear it to the demo on Saturday in support of the people of Burma.

Super Day Out

I had to work all weekend, looking after the Brat, but I got Monday off in return. I spent the whole day in Paris and it was amazing. I looked around the huge flea market, had an orange-flavoured beer in the café where Amelie was filmed, bought a new coat and then ended the day at a book reading in Shakespeare and Co.

I also bought yarn. I've only been here just over 4 weeks and I already have quite a stash, but luckily it's nearly all getting used. First off all, I found another Monoprix with a yarn section and got two skeins of 'Flamme Bayadere', 100% wool for €3 each.

Then I discovered (well, went to an internet café to get the address, then figured out my route on the metro, then studied a map for a loooong time figuring out where the hell I was in relation to Chatelet les Halles) La Droguerie. It's amazing inside, all the yarn is hanging from the walls in big loops and you buy it by weight. They also have an amazing range of buttons and beads. I bought 50g of mohair which is already on the needles, destined to be a hat.

I was supposed to have last night (Tuesday) off too, but I ended up babysitting. I wasn't happy because I needed a break from the Brat. It all worked out in the end though, because I meeting some friends tonight instead, for what is apparently the best hot chocolate in Paris.